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As different as we all are, there’s one thing most young women have in common: We’re all brought up to feel like there’s something wrong with us. We’re too fat. We’re dumb. We’re too smart. We’re not ladylike enough - ‘stop cursing, chewing with your mouth open, speaking your mind’. We’re too slutty. We’re not slutty enough.
Fuck that.
You’re not too fat. You’re not too loud. You’re not too smart. You’re not unladylike. There is nothing wrong with you.

Jessica Valenti; Full Frontal Feminism  (via electric-wish)

(via electric-wish)

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It’s a terrible thing, I think, in life to wait until you’re ready. I have this feeling now that actually no one is ever ready to do anything. There is almost no such thing as ready. There is only now. And you may as well do it now. Generally speaking, now is as good a time as any.

Hugh Laurie (via electric-wish)

(via electric-wish)

I'm not bothered by my weight (much) because I'm a naturally skinny person. But I have trouble with accepting other things about myself.

Hi Anon!

We’re all going to have our own individual insecurities. For some, it might be their weight, for others their acne or the size of their nose or breasts or thighs or not getting good grades or their shyness. Often I find that along with this “hierarchy of bodies” that we’ve established as a society - thin being the best/top and fat being the very worst/bottom, there’s also this absurd idea that if you are thin or have the “ideal” body type, that you’re also without insecurities or don’t deserve to feel bad about yourself.  

I’m not sure if I’m going off on a complete tangent, but what I am trying to say is that learning to accept yourself and accepting the parts of yourself that you don’t like is hard. It’s SO hard and it’s so much easier to just hate on yourself than to try and see yourself with love. Hating yourself - you know how to do that. Easily. Loving yourself? It’s like, where do you even start? How do you even do that? 

Self acceptance isn’t one moment. You won’t miraculously have it when you wake up tomorrow morning. It’s about moment to moment, day to day, week to week progress. It’s all about your mindset, your thoughts, your beliefs, your inner voice, the way you see yourself. It’s a kind of peace you can’t get from external, superficial, transient forces like the number of likes you get on your facebook picture. It comes from that part of you that’s hiding beneath all of the negativity and self deprecating thoughts that occupy your time and energy everyday. No one is going to give you self acceptance or self confidence. That comes from within. I know that it may seem like there’s some science or strategy to becoming more confident. Just google “how to build self confidence” or something along those lines and you will get tips and how-tos. I’m not saying those little tips don’t work. But I truly believe that at the core, it’s about your mindset and how you see yourself. It’s about fighting everyday to silence that negative voice in your head whenever it starts to criticize you and reminding yourself of your beauty and what you have to offer to the world apart from your body. One of my favorite quotes relates to this idea: “Your mind is not a cage. It’s a garden. And it requires cultivating.” - Libba Bray

So cultivate it. Cultivate your mind - not just of positive and loving thoughts, but of ideas. Beautiful, powerful ideas that will shape you and mold you as a person more than you could ever mold your own body by spending hours in front of the mirror or at the gym. 

“

My body is not a moral failing, a sign of my lack of willpower, or a measure of my health or worthiness. The only thing you can tell from my size is what size I am and what prejudices you hold about people my size. My body is amazing and I will stand up for it, take care of it, and be undeterred and unashamed of properly caring for it, especially because of societal bigotry perpetuated by people who make their money and/or their self-esteem by trying to rid the Earth of people who look like me.

Ragen Chastain (via internal-acceptance-movement)

(via gobeautiful)

If it scares you, face it.

I’m talking about food. Whatever makes you anxious, fills you with fear, makes you run the other way, possibly to your calorie counter or scale, face it. Don’t keep avoiding it. Stop depriving yourself of it. We try so hard to control what we eat, but food ends up controlling us.

No food is off limits. Slowly open yourself up to the foods that scare you. Take it day by day. Not just eating those foods, but eating those foods without guilt or regret. That’s key. Instead of punishing yourself for overeating or eating “unhealthy” by bingeing on more food or even throwing it all up, be kind. If you have to be your own cheerleader and talk yourself through those negative thoughts then so be it. When nothing is off limits, when everything is an option, you can make choices. Choices based on what you want and what will make you happy. You’re free. Realize that it’s not the specific food that’s making you overeat. It’s the mindset you have when you eat it. That all or nothing attitude stems from your black and white relationship with food.

I love chocolate, but for the longest time, I avoided it. When I did let myself eat it, I could never have just a little. I would eat the whole chocolate bar and feel awful. This made me avoid chocolate even more because I felt like I couldn’t control myself when I ate it. I realized that it wasn’t chocolate that triggered this reaction. It was my, “I shouldn’t be eating this, it’s not good for me, I am treating myself, but also testing myself, I need to make up for this chocolate by eating less or working out, it’s so good, I can’t stop, oh screw it, I’m already eating it, might as well eat the whole thing” attitude. 

Changing my mindset changed my relationship with food. Am I scared of chocolate anymore? No. Do I want it all the time? No. Do I binge on chocolate? No. Slowly, I am tackling my other “fear” foods and somehow by making peace with food, I am making peace with my body. 

Dedicate this week to facing one of your fear foods. If you overeat on it, fine! That’s expected. But don’t eat it with guilt or regret. Eat it, savor it, enjoy it, and if you have to, remind yourself that, “No food is off limits.” Create a positive eating experience and food will no longer control you as much as you try to control it.